Szeth's Dilemma
by Glistening Cerulean Eyes
Summary: After the big manly fight in the sky, Szeth dwells on the last thing Kaladin said to him. (Words of Radiance spoilers!)
1. Prologue

it was that time of day when it's not really night time but it isnt sunny as much any more. Szeth son son Vallano was walking through the city with a frown on his face and a sigh in his step (that is a metaphor bc he is sad right now). he was wearing some really tight jeans and a really tight shirt that showed everything off that his hot bod had to offer. but everyone was intimidated because he looked so sad and ALSO because some of them were like "hey isn't that the guy who killed our king, better skedaddle out of that bad boy's way" but they meant it respectfully, like they would totally ask him out for a soy milk latte if he didn't look so pained and innerspective. y was he inspective u ask? well I'm glad u asked. he was interspective because he had been thinking back 2 his muscular fight with top dog Kaladin in the skies which he had lost. but it's ok to lose sometimes.

but he had thought about what Kaladin had told him in his gruff man voice and he had realised... it was TRU. Szeth did not know... how TO LOVE.


	2. Chapter 2

anyway so szeth got back to his secret spy house which was actualy a really nice apartment. he put his groceris down and was liek "hey talking sword are u home?" and there was no answer. he was sad by this but he was already sad so this disapointment had nothign new 2 offer him. he treid to take his frustrations out in wii boxing but there was no use he was too good at it already. so he made himself a salad but becas he was sad it was more of a SADlad lol. it had pecans in it and it was really nice. but he was stil sad.

then there was a knock at the door and then the door opened and it was Nightblood his room mate the tlaking sword!

"hey man wassup" said nightblood strollin in like a dangeroos wapon. nightblod was not waring jeans because NIGHTBLOOD IS A SWORD. but if nightblood had decided 2 wear jeans somehow it would have pulled them off. well not really pulled them off. u no wat I mean.

"NIGTHBLOOD I DONUT NOW HOW TO LOVE" said Szeht sladly into his sadlad. he crid for a while and nightblood could'nt pat him on the back because nightblod is a sword ok.

"its okay pal I canot love either becas I am a killing machien" said nightblood empathetically.

"SAME" said szeth emotiaonyll. he ate a whole tub of icecream because that's what u do in girl movies when ur sad. "HWO DO WE DISCOVER HOW 2 LOVE KNIGHTBLOOD?"


	3. Chapter 3

"I KNOW" said nightblood excitedly after a long period of icecream eating and szeth crying in2 his food. "WHat IF WE ASKED MY GIRL FRIEND ABOUT WHAT LOVE IS?"

"that sounds like a super plan" said szeth enthusiastically and sadly.

"okay well lets go ask her" said nightblod. nightblood couldnt facebook message her because nightblood is a sword. so nightblood and szeth caught a bus 2 Syls' house because Syl is a sword and nightblood is a sword so theyre perfrct for each other. Iunno y u haven't figured that out alredy.

"please knock on the door because I can't knock because I'm a sword" said nightblood to szeth. so Szeth knocked on the door of Syl's house.

"WAIT I'm IN THE BATH" said Syl loudly. She is a good communicater. So Szeth and nightblood sat on the front step in the rain (it was raining because Seth is sad). nightblood didn't even care about the rain because nightblood is a fancier of dramatic wether.

"okay I am now not i n the bath" said syl opening the door. she was realy hot and was wearing a lot of lace and a short dress with stripey socks in a sort of cute punk look. her hair was done up really nice and fancy and she was wearing high heels that made her look really cool & in control. "oh helo friends do you want to come inside my house?"

"yes please" said nightblood sauntering isnide.

"u look sad szeth" said syl flipping her hair and giving the fingre 2 a passing voidbrignre. she hated thsoe loser.s "tell me al about ur love dilema."

"okie doke" said szeth moping inside like an assassin. the rain had made his jeans even tighter and syl wanted 2 get him off the street whre everyone was lookin at his butt appreciatevly. they needed 2 stop taking advantage of his sadness.


	4. Chapter 4

everyone sat on syl's couch. kaladin was not there becuase he was arging with lopen about the food pyramid which is VERY IMPORTANT 2 YOUR HEALTH. anyway

so everyone sat on syl's couch which was made of black leather and was really nice.

"so anyway I donut know how to love" said szeth with explanation. syl nodded wisely.

"ah yes a comon problem. okay szeht because ur my boyf's bestie I am going 2 be clear with u." she said elaboratively.

"okay" said szth guardedly.

"so what u ned 2 do... is get a lot of chocolate & go arund and give it 2 people u think are cool." she said intelligently.

"that doesnt sound very hard" said szeth suspicously.

"u say that NOW but just u wait haha," said syl conservatively.

"what does that mean?" said szeth woefully

"well it means that u wil have 2 confront ur inner demons and shadoes," said syl incrementally.

"ok" said szeth excessively. "im ready. can i take nightblood with me?"

"sure u can pal" said nightblood electively. so they went 2 by a lot of chocolate 4 szeths MISSION.


	5. Chapter 5

okay so the first person they went 2 give chocolate 2 was dalinar because he is super buff and manly and leaves a lot of broken heartz in his wake. he swanned around the war camps like a swan with a plan for saving the country.

"hey szeth how are you," he said nicely as szeth came into his tent. szeth qucily explained his mission (please go back and read about them in the last cahpter).

"oh thats nice" he said. "so u think im cool?"

"ur a realy cool guy dalinar and every1 on the shatterd plaines wants 2 b like you," said szeth emotionaly.

"omgsh thanks" said dalinar acepting his chocolate (it was caramel which is his favourite). "I hoep u find out what love is szeth"

"thank u said szeth. he and dalinar shook hands becuse that's the manliest thing 2 do. then szeth and nightblod went away 2 review what they had lernt.

"i felt nervous and sort of scared that I would be attacked by bridge men" said szeth.

"that is normal probably" said nightblood. "i mean I wouldnt no because I'm a sword but anyway."

"okay who is next " said snzeth.

nightblood took out the list. "ummmm it is renarin"

"okay lets go" said szeth preparedly.


	6. Chapter 6

so sneth snuck around using his assassin skillz until he found out where renarin was which ,was in the room next door 2 dalinar in the tent.

"hi renarine" said szeth doing a cool rolling moov in2 the rom. "i came here 2 brign u some chocoltes." he did a cool flip 2 get 2 his feet and it was like wow his legs wer soo mucsular? i cant even beleive he doesnt' have a girlfriend? how did that evn get past sando's editor. anyway.

"hi szeth did u come hre 2 brign me choclates bcaus u ar trying to lern wat love is?" said renarin in a cool way. he was reding a smart book called, the clockword princess but he put it down bcase he is polite like that. what a cool dude.

"wow did u figrue that out with ur seeing the future powers? "asked szeth very impresed.

"no the walls are just realy thin. were in a tent dudde," said renarin elaboratvely. and then ADOLIEN RAN IN2 THE ROM AND YELD "ALRIGHT ASSANI IN WhITE STOP TRYIgn 2 KIL LMY LITTLE BROWTHER" and DIVE TAKLED SZETH RIGHT INTO THE FLOOR LIKE A COOL RUGBY PALYER.

"NO WAUT I AM JUST TRYING 2 TELL HIM THAT HE IS COOL" said SZth.

ADOLINE GASPED!


	7. Chapter 7

an. haha sorry 4 the cliffhanger I hope u guys werent TO worried lol

"WHAT R U EVEN TRYING 2 SAY?" asked Asoline accusatively. he had szeth in a headlokc adn szeth was 2 sad about the misunderstanding 2 escape.

"I'M JUST SAYING 2 PEOPEL THAT I ThINK ARE COOL THAT THEY ARE COOL" said szeth emotionaly.

"Oh ok" said Aodlin letting him go of him. he fixed szths hair and patted him on the bicep(which was VERY nice btw). "i gues that;s ok." he looked at szthe very expectantly.

"what? " said szeth politely.

"oh nothing, I gues, whatever," said Adoin. he said "oh well I guess if there's no murder going on I shoud leave haha. he left with his head drooping like a sad person thinkign about how smetimes puppies can't alwys hve what they want? and wouldnt the puppies be so sad.

Seth wonderd why Adlone was so sad. "why is Adolen so sad?" he wondered.

"I think probably becas u didn't tell him u thought he was cool," said renarin, who was there.

"but he's like number 4 on my list" said szeth. "im not even meant 2 tell him I think he's cool yet."

Renarin looked gravely on his face. "Sezth"...he said siriously. "im afraid u sitll have a lot 2 learn abot love."


	8. Chapter 8

szeth was realy confused so he went outside and rang nightblood. "hey man what's up," said nightblood answering his phoen.

"I HAVEN't EVEN LEARNT ONE THING ABOUT LOVE YET?" excalmed szeth. he kiced a rock, but not like, the chef guy? it was juts a normal rock. haha better not kick rock man.

"What happened?" asked Nightblood intelligently. Ngihtblood had room mate sensing powers that let him know whenever Szth was sad.

"I am sad" said szeth which Mightblood already knew but he didn't interrupt, which was very polite of him for a sword. "I am sad because I accidentlaly made Adolin feel bad by not tellig him he was cool?"

"Oh no," said Nightblood. "what r u going 2 do?"

"I don't now said Szeth looking moody. he turnded up the collar of his balck leather jacket. "I guess when i'm up to him on the list I'll tlel him I'm cool."

"have you considered that mabe love might be more spontaneso" said Nightblood. "like maybe you should have just told him you think he is cool?"

Szeth thot about this and realsied maybe it was TRUE? he wrote it down just in case he forgot later. "should I go and tell him now?" he asked wonderingly.

"I think you should," said nightblood wisely. "also don't forget that later we agreed 2 play Mario kart 2gether."

"I wuld nevrer forget" said szeth and then he went 2 go and face his mistakes because he is experienceing character development.


	9. Chapter 9

CHAPTER EIGHT 

so szeth went to find Adolin by using his Windrunner powers of findin people. when he found Adolin Adolin was doing push ups outside. he had a bowl under his face so that his tears didn't turn the dirt to mud. he was doing push ups and crying really sadly. he had never known any1 wh o dindt thing he was cool & he ddnt no how 2 deal wiht it. which is fare enough bcause hes really col so nobody ever even things he isnt cool. then he rolled over and cried on the ground for a bit.

szeth didnt want to make hmi uncomfreotably by looming all over him so he laid on the ground and roled over. "hey man" he said friendlyly. he tiped over the bowl n got coverd in mud whoops.

"hey" said adolin pretening he wasnt cryign as cerulean tears went dwn hs face. "wats up."

"I just awnted 2 tell u...that I think u r cool," sid szeth. he put the blook of chocoalte on aydolins chest getly. haha mayb it wuld melt bcause of how hot adoln was.

"oh really?" sadn adoln sniffng. he pattd szeth on the shouldre . "u didnt hav 2 do this."

"no... said szeth. " I wanted 2." then they patted each other on the shoulder.s


End file.
